so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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