He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
