Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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