Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
