I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize