I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Damn victory sex feels great
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
