high people should be assigned attendants
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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