So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
