I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Randomize
