He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
