i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I have tasted many bathrooms
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
