And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
