I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
