Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
