dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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