why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
