I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
