Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Bring me that man meat
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
