so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
