fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Is it because I queefed?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
