this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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