Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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