he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize