My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
