Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
