did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
