He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
