I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
