NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
