So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I intend to get homeless drunk
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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