Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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