Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
