i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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