So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
