Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
i came on her dog
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
