I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
