Moan for me like Helen Keller
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
