i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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