but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
