walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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