I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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