Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize