i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
