Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
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