literally had 100 drinks last night.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Randomize
