Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
