i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
