the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
