Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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