i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Randomize
